The Holy Family--Joseph's family and God's

NOTE: Edited due to a stupid error on my part. 4th graph below is now correct--reading that Joseph died before Jesus died--not before he was born. I simply mis-typed. Apologies for the confusion.)

A few years ago my wife and I decided that we would look into adopting a child. We found that the cost was relatively expensive and we wanted (for a number of reasons) to insure that we could adopt a toddler with no special needs and found that this was actually a relatively unusual thing to come across. It turns out that most adoptions are either newborn babies or are much older children. After a long period of discernment, we decided to table the idea of adoption for some time until we were more financially and even emotionally stable. I wanted badly to be a father but have been unable to do so through natural means and now am even finding it difficult to adopt a child. While my dog feeds some of my parental longings, he is not a child but rather a canine best friend. I had to come to terms that I may indeed not ever become a father.

Throughout that time (and ever since then, actually) I began to pray to St. Joseph for guidance. Like myself he too found himself in some strange circumstances. Scholars tell us that St Joseph was probably around 30 (a ripe old age for someone at that point in antiquity) and a craftsman of some sort (some say Carpenter but he was probably a bit more than that). He was probably a widower who had made a deal to marry another young woman and now that time had come. Mary a young girl of about 14 was his betrothed. And then it all fell apart.

The teen was pregnant and he had not yet taken her into his home. So how could this be? Think of the scandal that this must have caused. Mary was probably accused of being a loose woman and Joseph was most likely embarrassed that he let his wife-to-be go off gallivanting with someone else. Perhaps Mary didn't want to marry him at all and so, she decided that this would be a way out.

However, Jewish law gave Joseph the right to stone Mary for becoming pregnant. And because Joseph was "a righteous man" it would be natural for others to suggest that he would do so. I often wonder if Joseph ever considered going through with this? What we know from scripture is that Joseph indeed decided to "divorce her quietly." It would spare everyone the embarrassment and would allow him to remain ritually pure and not the husband of some harlot. But something with Joseph did not sit right here. And thus he can't even sleep soundly--he begins to dream and God takes that opportunity to talk to Joseph to assure him that all is well and that he should take Mary as his wife. Later he also convinced him to take Mary and Jesus to Egypt even when that would go against any Jewish person's common sense (didn't we escape from Egypt into the promised land? Why would I want to go there?). The worst part of Joseph's experience is that he most likely died before Jesus died (since we don't see him at the foot of the cross) and never really figures out what the whole picture means.

But, Joseph, nevertheless, trusts in God and believes that all will be well just because God says so--even when his own experience tells him to think differently.

Do I ever have faith like that? Do I think that I will be OK even if God has decided that I won't be a father? DO I think that all will be well when the world often seems upside down? Do I consider that things might not be askew just because I don't always get what I want? Do I ever trust God enough to lead me when things seem dark?

If I'm honest with myself I'll see that I'm really no Joseph. That I want everything tied up in a nice neat package where life is predictable. And life, as Joseph knew all too well is rarely ever that easy. And trusting in God doesn't make it any easier but rather, it most likely makes them all the more harder.

The good news in the end is that Joseph was able to raise Jesus into a man who was able to see such compassion for the poor. He was able to awaken people to see all the good that was in them and make simple fisherman disciples and the founders of a church that still exists two thousand years later. Are we able to trust God that much when we may not even see the plan completed?

Perhaps therein is the point. Before God's kingdom is ever re-established--most of us will long be gone from this earth. Do we have faith strong enough to let go and trust that God really knows what he's doing? Do we have enough faith to allow God to use us without really knowing how it will all end?

I hope so. Because if so, then we are like Joseph.

Newish iPhone Application: ibreviary

I own an iPod touch and downloaded the ibrevary application at Deacon Greg's suggestion. I've seen a few of these types of online apps that one can use online or on phones and I think this one is #1 the most readable version. A nice font size and a fairly intuitive navigation. Check it out in itunes and here from America Magazine's blog.

Note: this application is now available in English. I do notice an occasional translation from the Italian that's slightly off--but I must say it is impressive.

The creator of iBreviary, Fr Paolo Padrini, runs a popular Italian website called Passi nel deserto ("Steps in the desert").

Emilie Lemmons' Catholic Spirit

A fine writer for the great Catholic Spirit Newspaper in Minneapolis who wrote one of the more balanced pieces on Catholic identity not that long ago. Lemmons fought cancer not long after having children. Her blog Lemmondrops was poignant and often tearful but yet honest as it addressed her fears and hopes for life with cancer and eventually, life after death.

A money quote if there ever was one from her editor at The Catholic Spirit:

How can a person facing death possibly experience joy? Here’s a little of what Emilie wrote:

“What if I just let go of that? What if I trust that even if I die tomorrow or next month or next year, things will somehow work out? What if I allow myself to put the outcome in God’s hands and just live intensely in the present, absorbing and embracing life as it happens? It’s not indifference or admitting defeat; it’s seeing the bigger picture.”

And she concluded:

“Maybe I am capable of experiencing joy after all. Maybe I don’t need to approach joy with resentment. Maybe that message is what my Advent light is illuminating. I pray that I can enter into the lesson God is trying to teach me.”

Rest in Peace, Em, and may your kids become great people by simply becoming half the person you were.

A hat tip to Rocco Palmo for the pic and the sad news.

Refusing Communion in Oz

This one comes from Deacon Greg over at the Deacon's Bench, it seems in Australia, a minister (I assume a lay person who is an extraordinary minister) refused a governmental official communion because of a recent vote on abortion. Turns out, however that the official voted against abortion in the proceedings and his wife is a pro-life lawyer. He was refused with his kids in his arms to make it even more embarrassing.

As a layman who is also a Eucharistic minister, I feel compelled to apologize to the official on behalf of all people who serve as Eucharistic Ministers. A priest, who knows him well, gave him communion on another line (good for him for going to the next queue (That's Aussie for line!).

Here we have one more another reason not to politicize communion. It becomes selective at the whimsy of the minister and there can be times, when that minister abuses that privilege or in this case, is simply an idiot who didn't get his facts straight. Maybe the Dingo (pictured above) ate his brain?

Jim Mckay

Here's the second of my pieces on The Faithful Departed for 2008. Jim McKay who I never had the pleasure to meet in my years in Broadcasting was someone who I really admired.

Eternal rest grant unto him, O Lord and let perpetual light shine upon him. May Jim's soul and all the souls of the faithful departed through the mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.

The Faithful Departed - Tim Russert

It is customary at the end of each year to look back and remember important figures who have died over the previous twelve months. But, instead of offering a laundry list of well-known deceased people's accomplishments, for Busted Halo's Faithful Departed feature we asked our writers to reflect on the spiritual impact that people—or institutions, buildings etc.—that passed away in 2008 had upon them. While most of our subjects had no explicit religious connections, their ability to touch souls—testified to in this year's reflections—is beyond doubt. From a sports commentator and a cardinal to a comedian and the "House that Ruth Built," these reflections demonstrate how powerfully alive the sense of the sacred can be in the most unexpected people and places.

Here's the first of my reflections on those that died this past year. We start with Tim Russert.

Always Advent For the Jets

I root for the New York Jets. Not only do the Jets lose every year they seem to be experts on finding out new ways to do it.

It's always Advent when you're a Jet fan.

The Jets at 8-3 seemed destined for the playoffs at the very least. But Jet fans once again let their team fool them, myself included.

1-4 in their last 5 games puts them out of the playoffs and after a disastrous loss two weeks ago in Seattle they really would've done everyone a favor if they just went out and shot themselves before taking on Miami this weekend. Coach Mangini, once known as the Man-Genius, was fired today and rightfully so.

I ask myself every year why I put myself through the trouble of rooting for these guys? They will always lose, or so it seems. However, like the Red Sox fans know now--losing builds character. It makes victory all the more savory.

It's also more interesting to lose. When I covered baseball I always found that the better stories were in the losing locker room. The pitcher who was tortured by personal demons, the rookie who dropped the ball and feels like he's going to be placed on the next bus out of town, the coach who simply made a bad decision, the complaints about officials and umpires. The other guys just won--but the losers ended up being a greater story.

I also find that losing creates opportunity for self-reflection (or at least it should). What am I falling short at in my life? What could I have done better? Am I satisfied with being #2? Am I really using all my gifts and talents wisely? Who do we need to help us? What needs to be my focus today?

And so... we have the Jets, asking many of the same questions. They now must deal with finding a new coach after him being touted as the next big coaching success and then crashing and burning. They have their aging Quarterback who wanted to have one last great day in the spotlight but couldn't push the hands of time back even one minute more. And they have their cursed history that reminds all of us of a Lucy-football--the one that she pulls away from Charlie Brown and sends him crashing down and nearly killing himself.

One day...next year...the longing...waiting for the savior...the darkness...lighting small candles and seeing just a bit more light each week...

But when does the savior come?

Never...it's always Advent when you root for the Jets.

But Advent is often a lot more interesting than Christmas.

Doubt

"What do you do when you're not sure?"

Indeed this is the question that epitomizes the entire play turned movie Doubt in which Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Meryl Streep turn in Oscar worthy performances of a priest and nun at odds with one another over the possible molestation of a Catholic School's first black student by the priest himself.

The beauty of this movie is that as all good stories go--it is the characters themselves that draw the viewers in and make the entire production a thrilling and vivid whodunit adventure.

The play is set in 1964 which is a strange year for Catholics. Kennedy was just assassinated and the winds of change have been blowing in the Catholic Church's Second Vatican Council. They play makes no apologies for using the wind as a symbol throughout and placing change as a sideline debate between said priest and nun.

Streep plays Sr Aloysious who is a dour old school crank who keeps the children of the Catholic School living in fear of her but at times, shows glimmers of condolence. A second nun, Sr James seems like a naive woman who accepts the priests explanation of trying to protect the boy from a minor transgression as an alibi for the accusation of sexual abuse. It is here that we find that nearly everything is upside-down. Sr Aloysious is hoping to keep the church's winds of change at bay but is also tied down from having Fr Flynn removed because she holds no power as a woman to bring forth an accusation to her superiors who will most likely not find her credible. At the same time, the simple-minded Sr James is open to ideas of a "more welcoming church" but is naive of the ways of the world and the mere possibility that Fr Flynn might indeed be a predator ("Isn't it easier to just believe him?" Sr Aloysious asks her). Fr Flynn is looking to bring the church into a new time but then paradoxically uses the church's hierarchical structure to defend himself and even to try to gain some psychological advantages (he enters Sr Aloysious's office and sits in her chair at one point and threatens to recommend to the pastor that she be removed as principal).

The mere simplicity of easy answers brings Doubt to what we all think of the characters make-up. Is the priest guilty or is the crotchety nun just harboring a grudge, cranky that her church is changing without her?

I would've loved to see this play but I think the movie does a good job of staying true to the play's make up. Shanley directed it after all, so there's not much of a surprise there. I did read the play after seeing the movie and it does seem more suited for the stage. However, catch this movie and become enraptured by two great performances and shake hands with the winds of change that will blow your convictions all over the theatre.

The Ending of the Year

A lovely, yet, bone-chilling reflection on the end of another year from Nicole Sotelo over at the National Catholic Reporter.

And then I thought of Jesus who also wept when faced with the possibility of his own death. He must have known his radical actions were catching the eyes of authorities who could end his life. Did Jesus ever make anything resembling a six-months-to-live checklist, I wondered? What would have been on his list? How did he spend his final days?

Please keep her and other survivors of cancer in your prayers this year's end and read the rest of her article here.

Be a "Yes Man"

A thought-provoking review of a movie I recently saw, Yes Man with Jim Carrey and the adorable Zooey Dechantal, by the esteemed Paul Jarzembowski over at Spiritual Popcorn. Here's the money quote:

Perhaps every now and then, we need to be "yes men" - when a poor man asks for our help, when a friend asks to talk, or when an risky opportunity comes our way.

Like the parable of the talents in the Scriptures (Matt. 25:14-30), it was the servant who took the risk and said "yes" that reaped the greatest reward. Or like the disciples themselves who risked and sacrificed their livelihoods to follow Jesus - who said "yes" to His "follow me" - that had their lives forever changed.

Saying "yes" to new and bold opportunities, to those in need, and to exciting directions in our lives can make our world a lot more colorful - not bleak and frigid like a Chicago winter.

While I have not lived through a Chicago winter, I find winter to be invigorating, even with the gray overcast skies. But Paul's point is a grand one. Are we responding "yes" to the things that truly will invigorate us?

Merry Christmas

"And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men." -Luke 2:8-14

Last night I went to Midnight Mass at St. Sebastian's in Woodside and it was possibly the most beautiful mass I have ever been to at Christmas. After communion they shut all the lights in the church out save for the lights on the tree and the manger. The choir sang Silent Night and then after a brief moment of silence, the lights came up and we continued with mass. Really beautiful...and here I was without a camera.

I have been to masses with the best choirs, the best preaching and even ones that welcomed parishioners and visitors well... But sometimes just a very simple ritual can bring an entire church to tears. I saw a lot of people drying their eyes after the lights came up on the altar and off. People from all different walks of life gathered as one into the life of a little baby who would be born in the wood of a manger and give his life on the wood of the cross. Christmas reminds me that in the simple birth of a baby, God comes to humanity as human...a simple birth, but a profound act that changed the history of the world as shows us the depth of our God's love for us.

Merry Christmas

Pope Benedict on World Youth Day

John Allen reports on the Pope's Year in Review. He seems to say much about what I claim about World Youth Day in my book, Googling God, specifically in the chapter called Pope as Rock Star.

“What, therefore, is the nature of what happens at World Youth Day?” the pope asked rhetorically. “What are the forces which run through it? Fashionable analyses tend to consider these days as a variant of modern youth culture, as a kind of rock festival with the pope as the star. With or without faith, these festivals would be more or less the same thing, and in this way the question of God can be taken off the table. There are also Catholic voices that cut in this direction, seeing the whole thing as a big show, perhaps attractive, but ultimately of little significance for the question of faith and the presence of the Gospel in our time. By that account, these would be moments of joyful ecstasy, but at the end of the day they leave everything as it was before, without influencing one’s life in a deep way.”

Benedict then proceeded to take the critique apart.

“That analysis fails to explain the uniqueness of these days, and the special character of the joy they create, their capacity to create communion,” he said.

“First of all, it’s important to take account of the fact that the World Youth Days don’t consist just of that one week which is visible to the world,” Benedict said. “There’s a long path, exterior and interior, that leads to it. The Cross, accompanied the image of the Mother of the Lord, makes a pilgrimage through the nations. The faith, in its own way, needs to be seen and touched. The encounter with the Cross, which is touched and carried, becomes an interior encounter with Him who died on the Cross for us. The encounter with the Cross awakens in the intimacy of the young people the memory of that God who wanted to become human and suffer for us. We also see the woman that He wanted as his mother. The solemn days are simply the culmination of this long journey, with which the young people meet one another and move together towards meeting Christ.”

“In Australia, it wasn’t an accident that the long Via Crucis through the city becoming the culminating event of these days,” the pope said. “It expressed anew all that had happened in the preceding years, and pointed to Him who brings all of us together: that God who loves us all the way to the Cross.”

“Thus, the pope is not the star around which everything turns. He is totally, and solely, the Vicar. He points to the Other who stands in our midst.”

I would add one thing. That while WYD is an awesome experience of the Papacy and does indeed point towards Christ through the experience, it also is only as good as what comes after it. What kind of follow up programming exists beyond WYD? Almost none. Let's get to work.

(Photo above by Lori Rogers)

St Monica's kinda...hot?

It's the feast day of St Monica and this rendering is simply stunning. She could be a model on the cover of Vogue and nobody would question it. Head on over to The Deacon's Bench and find out more information on this icon and the great Saint.

One of the many cool stories about St Monica, who was the mother of St. Augustine was that she was very concerned about his filandering ways as a young man and constantly prayed for his conversion. It was never her intention for him to so radically convert and become a priest and then, a bishop. (My own editorial comment would be that she wanted him to settle down and give her some grandchildren!) She was told that she prayed too hard!

I often wish that I had that kind of persistence in prayer. I often give up much too easily and think situations are hopeless. Today I pray that I have that Monica-like persistence to pray without ceasing.

Second funny aside: I remember once in college being very down about something at work. I then remember one of our managers was trying to motivate us a bit and make things a bit fun while we worked. So she started cutting out headlines from the paper that referred to all of us. Mine was "Mike: Don't Worry, Be Happy!"
Funny thing is that I still have that headline and it instantly made me laugh, fell better and it did in fact bring me out of my funk and helped me do a better job that day. The woman's name who gave it to me? You guessed it: Monica.

So today pray for people who don't much like themselves and get down on themselves--sometimes for no good reason. All they need some days are a Monica.

The BustedHalo Christmas Video

Merry Christmas from us to you.

Join Our Cause

Hey folks--

It's that time of year. While the economy is kicking everyone's butt, I realize that it's not the best time to ask people for money. However, I wanted to see if you would consider not only making a donation (big or small!) to Busted Halo this year before the year's out. We have set up a causes page on facebook to make things easy for facebook users. But we also have an appeal on Busted Halo where you can hear more about our ministry.

I was in the mood to see Cardinals

After thinking about Cardinal Dulles' funeral and Cardinal Egan's words today, I got a bit nostalgic for my World Youth Day Experience in Sydney. Here's the theme song and some snapshots in this video.



Mind you, after going to World Youth Day in Toronto I swore off big crowds and the whole experience--but now I find myself considering attending WYD 2011 in Madrid. We'll see where God leads me. Who knows, I may be close to being a Deacon by then? Rocco Palmo also has details about the early preparations for Madrid.

Dulles Funeral

Avery Cardinal Dulles, S.J. was laid to rest today at St. Pat's. Fr. Jim Martin has the event covered in depth here. One particular piece moved me to tears.

Cardinal Egan's warm and moving homily took as its central image an ancient crucifix he had once seen in Umbria; from one side the face of Christ appeared contorted in pain; from the other illumined by joy. This image, suggested Egan, could characterize Avery's life, one of triumph and, towards the end, of pain...

Cardinal Egan remembered visiting Avery on his 90th birthday at Fordham Unversity--when Avery was bedridden, crippled by the recurrence of his polio--for a Mass in his honor. The cardinal wheeled Avery's bed up the aisle of the Fordham chapel, but with difficulty, as a result of Egan's childhood polio. "I'm afraid it's a case of the lame pushing the lame," said Egan to Dulles.

With that Avery broke into broad smile, and Egan was put in mind of that crucifix.

Condolences to the Dulles family and to the Jesuits of the New York province.

Fr Jim "McScrooge" Martin Responds

Fr Jim Martin (whose PC is on the fritz) emailed me the following comment:

Of course your card is lovely! It has not only you but the Holy Family, too! Who could object? Actually, that NPR piece really hit a nerve. I think people missed the point that I wasn't saying I was against family photos, just ones that usurped the place of the Holy Family.
Anyway, Merry Christmas from Father McScrooge, SJ.

And if you haven't bought a gift for that special someone in your holy family yet--try Fr Jim's book: My Life With the Saints

Fr Jim Martin, SJ on Holiday Cards

Fr Jim has this cranky take on holiday cards from NPR today.

Family (Christmas) cards display — on the front — a photo of a happy family, typically wearing red-and-green scarves or red-and-green sweaters. Sometimes the family dog is included, wearing a scarf covered with slobber. Just as often, family cards show the clan on their summer vacation, posing jauntily in bathing suits in the Caribbean. These cards don't say "Merry Christmas" as much as "Look where you didn't go!"

But I enjoy the photos more when they're inside the card, not the card itself. Because more and more, even devout Christians have been replacing Jesus, Mary and Joseph with themselves.

I wonder if our card (below) which has our picture with the dog and a spiritual message and manger image would calm his dulcet tones?

St Joseph Who?

Here's my big acting debut as St Joseph with America Magazine: