I went to the funeral of a friend today who died of colon cancer and who was not yet 50 years old and has an 8 year old son. Rapheal was a great guy, not just a lawyer but the labor relations council for the National Football League's management counsel. I knew him simply as someone who loved his family--especially his wife Roberta and son Rapheal III, his friends, his church and clearly his God. He always helped everyone he met including countless alumni of his beloved Indiana law school
I've been helping out my priest-friend Fr. Jack Collins, CSP with a parents group where the goal is to explore our faith so that we can pass it on to the next generation. I'm really just there to help Fr. Jack but, I've gotten into the group's dynamic discussions as my wife Marion and I continue to discuss adoption. Roberta has been a huge comfort to me in the group and Raphael, while more of the silent type, was also someone who had a rock-solid faith that moved me more than he probably knew. He'd always have a great story or even a struggle in his own life that he was able to convey in such a human way--that let us all know that we were all going to be OK, no matter what happens to us. Little did we know that this was probably Raphael's way of saying good-bye to us without us actually knowing it.
Fr, Jack mentioned two wonderful things in his homily. Fr. Jack also lost his father not long after his 8th birthday. He told little Rapheal that he knew how he felt and that even though his dad was gone that he's always been able to keep him in his heart and talk to him whenever he felt like it all these years.
Little Raphael responded: "Fr. Jack! We're Twins!"
Ok, go get a tissue. I'll wait....
His second point was that many of us in the parish didn't realize how serious Rapheal's cancer was. Some of us didn't even know that he was sick. "He refused to live in the shadow of his illness," Roberta told our group in an email this week. Fr. Jack recalled this and then noted. "And he didn't....
He lived in the shadow of his God."
Amen.
Eternal rest grant unto him O'Lord and let perpetual light shine upon him. May Rapheal's soul and all the souls of the faithful departed through the mercy of God rest in peace. Amen
2 comments:
ITS HARD TO TYPE WITH TEARS IN YO EYES.EVERYTHING IS SO BLURRY BUT WHEN MY UNCLES PICTURE POPED UP ON THE PAGE IT HURT BECAUSE HE WAS FULL OF SO MUCH LIFE.I WALK PASS MY REFRIGERATER EVERYDAY & LOOK AT HIM & HIS FATHERS PICTURES THAT I HAVE & SAY I LOVE YA.IT JUST FEELS DIFFERENT LOOKING AT HIM ON THE INTERNET.I MISS HIM & HIS FATHER THEY WERE MY FRIENDS MY MENTORS MY SECRET KEEPERS I COULD TELL THEM ANYTHING NO MATTER WHAT THEY WOULD ALWAYS UNDERSTAND.ME & MY UNCLE GO WAY BACK TO WHEN HE WENT TO INDIANA UNIV.MY FATHER TOOK ME TO GO VISIT MY UNCLE.I WAS SO LIL & HE WAS SO BIG HE WOULD JUST THROW ME UP IN THE AIR & CATCH ME I REMMEMBER BEING SCARED AT FIRST THAT HE WOULDNT CATCH ME BUT HE ALWAYS DID & THATS HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP STARTED.SINCE I WAS A KID I KNEW THAT MY UNCLE WOULD ALWAYS CATCH ME.I REMMEMBER THAT VISIT TO I.U.LIKE IT WAS YESTERDAY HE TAUGHT ME HOW TO EAT SPAGHETTI WITH A FORK & WE WATCHED A SCARY MOVIE THAT NIGHT & EVERYTIME SOMETHING SCARY WOULD HAPPEN I WOULD DUCK BEHIND MY UNCLE.THAT WAS ALMOST THIRTY YEARS AGO.WHEN I LIVED IN MARYLAND AS A TEEN MY UNCLE WOULD MAKE SPECIAL TRIPS TO SEE ME & I ALWAYS NEW WHEN I WAS IN TROUBLE BY THE WAY HE WALKED UP TO THE HOUSE.MY UNCLE WAS A BIG GUY & I DIDNT WANT ANY TROUBLE OUT OF HIM BUT I NEW WHEN HE CAME DOWN THOSE STAIRS I WAS ABOUT TO GET IT.HE SAID I KNOW THAT YOUR DISCOVERING GIRLS BUT SKIPPING SCHOOL & CUTTIN CLASSES IS NOT ACCEPTABLE.SO HE WOULD GIVE ME THE TRADITIONAL PREVOT SLAP AROUND LIKE ALL OF HIS BROS.WOULD DO ME & THEN TAKE ME OUT TO EAT.WE WOULD SPEND ALL DAY & ALLNIGHT TOGETHER JUST TALKIN ABOUT GUY STUFF.THE LAST TIME I SEEN MY UNCLE WAS ON MOTHERS DAY HE CAME TO INDY TO VISIT MY GRANDMOTHER.I SPENT THE ENTIRE DAY WITH HIM.HE HAD LOST SOME WEIGHT BUT I FIGURED IT WAS JUST THE TREATMENTS HE WAS GETTIN.I WOULD ALWAYS ASK HIM HOW HE WAS DOING? & HE WOULD REPLY IAM DOING BETTER.HE WAS LIEING & DIEING RIGHT BEFORE MY EYES.I CAN ONLY IMAGINE WHAT HE REALLY WANTED TO SAY WHEN I ASKED THAT QUESTION.A PART OF ME WAS MAD AT HIM FOR NOT TELLING ME BECAUSE WE WERE FRIENDS MORE THEN ANYTHING ELSE.HOW DO YOU TELL THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE THAT THEIR TIME WITH YOU IS GOING TO BE SO SHORT?HE DID WHAT HE TRAINED ME TO DO TAKE IT ON THE CHIN & DONT FLINCH.HE NEW I WOULDNT HAVE TREATED HIM THE SAME IF I KNEW HOW SICK HE REALLY WAS NONE OF US WOULD HAVE.THE LAST TIME I SAW HIM I KISSED HIM ON HIS HEAD & TOLD HIM I LOVED HIM LIKE I WOULD ALWAYS DO & HE SAID I LOVE YOU TO.THE NEXT TIME I TALKED TO HIM HE WAS ON HIS DEATHBED & STILL ACTING LIKE NOTHINGS WAS WRONG SO I HAD TO ACT LIKE NOTHING WAS WRONG WITH HIM.IN MY SOUL I KNEW THAT WAS GOING TO BE OUR LAST CONVERSATION.SO I MADE HIM LAUGH.
I NEVER NEW THE BIG TIME LAWYER THAT EVERYBODY ELSE KNEW HIM TO BE I JUST KNEW MY BIG STRONG UNCLE THAT WOULD THROW ME HIGH IN THE AIR & CATCH ME AS A LIL BOY.I GUESS THATS HOW HE FELT ABOUT GOD HE KNEW THAT GOD WOULD ALWAYS CATCH HIM NO MATTER WHAT. I LOVE & MISS YOU,WE LOVE & MISS YOU. YOU WERE OUR HOPES & DREAMS.WATCHING YOU LET US KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO GO FROM NOTHING TO SOMETHING IF YOU WORK HARD & KEEP GOD IN YO LIFE & NEVER STOP TRYING.
YOUR FRIEND & NEPHEW DAMIEN PREVOT
I just read the journal for IU Law school. I am so sorry for you loss. I knew him in law school. He made me laugh and was a good and loyal friend. When I was a juvenile bench officer in LA I would tell kids that I had a friend who not only played football in college but he was a lawyer for the NFL and that you have more choices when you study and work hard. We have never met but I am so very sorry for your loss. Steff Padilla '85
Post a Comment